People synchronize their
movements in conversation just as if they were dancing to
their talk. When they are in agreement the dance flows
on without interruption, but when a disagreement arises the
dance gets disrupted. Ordinary people looking at a
videotape of a counseling session were able to see a moment of
disagreement, even with the sound turned off, by the awkward
movements of the participants. In fact, the disruption
was so clear, people were able to locate the exact point even
listening to an audio tape played backwards.
Comfortable moments in
conversation are a good indicator of successful
communication. Uncomfortablel moments are the most
reliable sign that something has gone wrong. You should
not try to avoid uncomfortable moments in conversations, you
should pay special attention to them when they happen.
Those are the points in which you are most likely to have
finally gotten to the critical issue. Practice becoming
comfortable with uncomfortable moments.
